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Tolu Fiz Akanee is a thinker, writer and speaker; the author of A-Z Life lessons

Friday, April 29, 2011

The house of mourning

 source: Google images

New births are recorded daily
Some received with joy, some with mixed feeling, others with regret.

People die daily
Someday you will die
Might be in a couple of hours, weeks, months, years or decades
But death is inevitable

All we possess are gifts from God and the Lord never requests for any of those things back from us. Nothing but the life He gives. He takes this one that we might enjoy life eternal.

I just got back into Lagos this evening after a short stay in the house of mourning.

It got to me a couple of weeks ago when I heard the news of his death as my mum broke down in tears on the phone, but the thought of his glorious exit did not spur up any feeling other than that of gratitude to God for a life well spent; It was easier to maintain that perspective while here in Lagos. But until I got to the centre of this all and his son rose up to the podium in church yesterday evening to give his eulogies, tears flowed freely from my eyes as he broke down in tears mid way into his speech; he held the tears back as he tried to exhaust what he had in writing but moments after that he burst into tears again as he was ushered back to his seat. Death is real.

I've never lost anyone that close to me before, and if he had not truly lived a righteous life, I wouldn't be discussing my deceased uncle on my blog. Very kind and humble man! As a kid he would always come around with his wife in their Peugeot station wagon and they would always come with sacks of this special "Garri saki" for momsy. He was a generous man, never will he visit without dropping something for the boys!
I remember the last days I spent with him, memories of the Saturday evening of his 62nd birthday in August 2009 is still fresh in my heart. For hours we sang hymnssssss. We started off singing songs we knew by heart, then we grabbed hymn books and we sang for hours after which he prayed for us and shared his thoughts on marriage and other things of life.
So I saw my uncle this morning and he looked the same. He was fast asleep and my mom kept on calling "Broda Tunde" but he wouldn't wake up. That's the closest I've been to a corpse and if not for the coffin one would think he was taking a nap while waiting for others to dress up too and join him in his outing. Death is real. It's an endless sleep!

I'm happy he died a righteous man, he knew he was going, he had ample time to give his parting words to his loved ones. To me, that's a golden opportunity. I know he is with the Lord right now.

So Solomon said
"(1) A good name is better than precious oil; and the day of death, than the day of one's birth. (2) It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting: for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart. (3) Sorrow is better than laughter; for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made glad."
- Ecclesiastes 7:1-3

And just like the pastor said in church this morning. So many of us go to the house of morning to sympathize and share memories of the departed while we fail to reflect on our own lives.


My Uncle is gone. Who's next?
How prepared are we for the inevitable?
How prepared are we for death?

The game, they say is the same but the players are different. On the stage of life, they say same stage different actors.
"Teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom"

What are you doing with what you've got today. Yesterday is gone and never to be replayed
Tomorrow is only a promise
Today is all you've got
What are you doing today?

It's so easy to say the cliché "live each day as though it were thy last" but is that truth reflected in our daily lives??

It is important that we all take some time out to go into the house of mourning (a place of sober reflection) to think things through. If you die today, what will be said of you? What legacy would you have left behind?

I spent a couple of days in the house of mourning and it has helped to place better relevance on time

3 comments:

Myne said...

Touching write-up. My condolences to your family on the loss.

*Michael Onobote* said...

May His gentle soul rest in peace. Really thought-provoking piece Tolu

jaycrown said...

Nobody is exempted

We are all in it

The Only thing that differentiates us is instant of occurrence

Nobody but we surely can……

http://blackmeetswhite.blog.com/2011/03/25/nobody/